Could Things Be Any Harder?

I dont even know a world that could explain the way that this Christmas is turning out. My parents, I can't even explain it! I feel so horrible for how everyone is so sad and nothing is turning out right. My mom, she is going absolutely nuts. I dont know what to do. Her family called and said that they were coming up today and my mom went nuts because she had to go and buy gifts for them, and then they called and said they aren't coming! How selfish is that? She worked so hard for nothing! My mom is my hero this Christmas. She has been there for everyone and has went through her own struggles at the same time. My aunt isn't having a good Christmas and its effected our whole family. But my mom, through all of her struggles and her own hurts, has been there for my aunt, grandmother, and me! Well not really me, because I really haven't opened up to her about whats making me so mad. I just feel like Christmas isn't the same anymore. Since my grandmother died last year, we didnt have anywhere to go on Christmas eve, so my mom's side came here last year, and now this year, we have nothing. And then on Christmas Day, since everyone on that side of the family is pretty much upset and not really in the spirit, its not going to be the same...I just want my family to be happy again, and I want Christmas to be normal!

A Holiday Turned Into A Sad Occasion

Earlier this morning I was watching cartoons (yes, I know, I may be a bit too old for that but oh well!). It was a commercial and this channel was singing about the holidays. At the end it said, "put your holiday preference here." I was kind of confused. Okay, so there is more than one holiday celebrated at this time of year, but everyone's forgetting the reason as to why they get presents and everything else. When I watched this staion when I was younger, they would almost make the cartoon characters into like the Nativity Scene and like it actually had a meaning to it. Now its like lets forget about Christmas all together and just call it "the holidays." I just don't get this. I have a friend who says that she is a buddhist but yet she expects to get presents at Christmas time. I don't believe that Buddhist's celebrate Christmas, but maybe I am wrong. And if I am wrong, then she doesn't know any better. Because when I asked her she said that well for this season she won't be Buddhist and will celebrate Christmas as a Catholic. See, thats not the real meaning of everything. I am so excited to give my gifts to all of my friends because I love them and want them to be happy. One of my friends came over yesterday and we exchanged gifts. The look on her face when I gave her my gift to her is what I live for. Sigh, I'm going to find away to bring CHRISTmas back into my world!