Not Quite Over It

Your first love is always the hardest to get over......unfortunately, mine is taking over a year lol. Theres no way to explain it, I miss him. And when I am looking for someone new, they have to be just like him. I totally screwed things up when I ended things between us, and I regret it one hundred percent. How stupid could I be!? There is no one else like him, and I dont think that there ever will be! If there is, he must be perfect....sigh Ive never felt this way about someone before, and its really bothering me. We are great friends, and I think that that is all we will be. My dream will not come true, and if God wants it to work, then he also has to listen to God. So it makes things complicated...when will I get over this?

Ready For Whatever Comes My Way

Okay, so last night I have this like breakdown just tears flowing everywhere! It wasnt really about something big or like about something I did... I guess I just have been taking in so much...like dealing with others and not really having time for me. Its not these people's faults, but I guess I just need a break for now maybe. But then I realized that its okay to cry. Its okay to just let everything come out sometimes. In fact, its even better that way! I remember feeling so worthless last night, but heck, no one in this world is worthless because God even told us that we were made for Him. He has such a plan for us that it wont harm us, but give us a bright and unfolding future! Instead of laying here thinking about all of the trouble that is going on around me, I will deal with them as they come and let God turn those things around for the brighter side. I taught Jr Church this morning and I was reading through the lesson and found it to even be an awesome encouragement to me! The scripture was Luke 15:1-7. This is what it says:

1-3By this time a lot of men and women of doubtful reputation were hanging around Jesus, listening intently. The Pharisees and religion scholars were not pleased, not at all pleased. They growled, "He takes in sinners and eats meals with them, treating them like old friends." Their grumbling triggered this story.
4-7"Suppose one of you had a hundred sheep and lost one. Wouldn't you leave the ninety-nine in the wilderness and go after the lost one until you found it? When found, you can be sure you would put it across your shoulders, rejoicing, and when you got home call in your friends and neighbors, saying, 'Celebrate with me! I've found my lost sheep!' Count on it—there's more joy in heaven over one sinner's rescued life than over ninety-nine good people in no need of rescue.

This brings a huge smile to my face! I think that it is so awesome that God loves us that much! Its amazing that He would have died only if I was the only person alive. Its awesome that He loves us that much! That is something to make anyones day!