I Seem To Have Lost My Oar

I am going to try and be clever and use an analogy here, so this may not turn out too well! This summer, I have paddled my way into this deep water that is not safe. The temptations are high, and the environment isn't the greatest. The water is rough, and many storms pass through. At the beginning of the summer, I was doing great and had both of my oars, and my life jacket. As the summer continued to go on, the storms seem to get really bad and I lost control of one of my oars. So here I am, with one oar, and a life jacket that I am not letting go of. The thing is, the storms are not going to stop anytime soon, so its only a matter of time until I will lose my other oar. Then, I will be left with only my life jacket. Now to explain this whole analogy thing because it probably didn't make any sense at all. Both of my oars are the growth that I am using. Let me explain this. My growth in Christ has slowly enabled me to withstand storms that otherwise I could never fight. Before, putting myself into this environment was like walking the plank. Before, I would have lost both of my oars right away. I am slowly losing my control (my oars), and going back to where I was a couple of years ago. It seems as if my decisions are worse now than ever. As Paul has stated, I do the things that I wish not to do. My life jacket, of course, is my God. That life jacket will never come off, but only if I choose to utilize it will it come into play. It has to be a decision of mine. My life jacket is buckled so close to me that there is no way that it is going to come off. My prayer, Oh God, is to sprint to you and allow you to be my strength!